http://billandjill.com Sat, 19 Jul 2008 22:16:00 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en "You want two burgers?" ...pause... "Okay." "You know, you don't have to say yes, just because I ask you if you want somethting." "I know. It's just that I think that maybe I don't want it, until I hear you say it. And you wouldn't be suggesting it if it wasn't a good idea, ... http://billandjill.com/2008/07/16/the-best-defense/ "Okay. We're going to need you to put on this white, official-looking labcoat. Then, look into the camera and act as though you're holding a Shell gas card. And since we perplexingly don't have an actual card for you to hold, simply spread your finger and thumb really far apart, ... http://billandjill.com/2008/07/14/approximately-zero-percent-of-each-sale-goes-toward-advertising/ If you throw a plastic Whiffle ball across our toy room, it's likely that it's going to travel in a curved path over the jumble of assorted blocks, staring toddlers, and DVDs that are NO TOUCH, and shouldn't even be on the floor anyhow. It'll start low, arc upward, and ... http://billandjill.com/2008/07/09/whiffle-is-a-trademark-of-the-whiffle-ball-inc/ Daddy, Liam, and Nate take a late afternoon trip to the park. This was the sixth of six in as many days, and the only one for which I took the camera. If you're interested in further details of the chase scenes, table talk, or the goosedown-beshitting of wandering hands, click ... http://billandjill.com/2008/07/07/scenes-from-a-park/ I'd gone in to get the boys something from the refrigerator, and ended up sitting on the far wall with my back to the corner, where Charlie's bed was, my head in my hands. The boys followed me in, uncertain. "Da-da trine do?" asked Nate. "What is da-da tryin' to do?" ... http://billandjill.com/2008/06/30/good-charles/ Our backyard wedding, four years ago today. Happy anniversary, Buhbee! http://billandjill.com/2008/06/26/in-the-year-2004/ "Nate, do you remember playing with Play-Doh when we were little?" Liam asked, "And I'd keep all my colors neat and separated, and you'd just mash yours into one giant mauve ball?" From his bodycast, Nate blinks once for yes. http://billandjill.com/2008/06/25/in-the-year-2042/ ever type something one-handed and hold a grunting 7-mont h old as a 3.5 year repeatys incessantly "Hhide Liam hide liam hide liam!" and simultaneousy throws his blankets over your keyboard, whi?ch is ?baslanced on a pillow on your lap while a two year old yells "dada. stand. UP!" and ... http://billandjill.com/2008/06/22/you-try-spelling-simultaneously-under-these-conditions/ Liam was having an "off" weekend a few weeks ago. Yeah..."off"...we'll just leave it at that. One of the few tactics that consistently works to redirect his energy when he's freaking out is to ask him if he wants to help you with something. Doesn't matter what it is. You could ... http://billandjill.com/2008/06/20/if-the-word-cellulite-comes-out-of-that-kids-mouth-im-selling-him-on-ebay-free-shipping/ Practice feeling the keys on your key ring and learn to identify each one without having to actually look at them. That way, if you ever go blind, you'll still be able to find your car key. http://billandjill.com/2008/06/19/key-planner/