When Bill was 7, he had giant, crooked teeth that grew in upside-down, and monkeys laughed at him.

Jill once got so mad at a woman in traffic that she looked her in the eye then licked the inside of her own car window.

Bill can bend reality with Photoshop.

Jill can bend steel bars with her voice.

Sometimes Bill looks like himself, other times he still looks like himself, just a little bit different.

Jill can throw beds at people.

Bill and Jill met in 2001 on eBay, and met in real life seven months later. In 2002, they moved into an old Victorian home that was once a boarding house, and a ghost stole all their forks. In 2004, they were married in their back yard by a good friend who is a school principal and part-time standup comedian. Bill wore sandals and Jill wore red, and there was BBQ, live music, and fireworks. The ceremony was held beneath an old walnut tree that, while beautiful, drops approximately 650 pounds of ankle-turning walnuts every fall.

Later in 2004, Liam arrived. In early 2006 came Nate, and Sam just signed on several months ago at the end of 2007. As they grow up, all three will be spending a fair amount of time outside each fall, picking up walnuts.

These are their stories.